Hate Me For All The Things I Didn't Do For You

I just listened to this song, which I used to dedicate to someone very dear to my heart. The lyrics are very tormenting, to my ears, to my heart, as every single word is very true. Emm, I can’t help but to think that kadang-kadang kiter cari sejuta sebab untuk melukakan hati orang, to push someone away from our lives. That’s very selfish, mean, egoistic, yet we still do it. We decide to ignore their feelings, to disregard all the consequences. Sometimes, it's because we think it is the best thing to do at that very moment... I did.

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head

They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed

Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone

Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home

There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain

An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?

And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?

And will you never try to reach me? It is I that wanted space

.

I'm sober now for 3 whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with

The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again

In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night

While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight

You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate

You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take

So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind

And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
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Hate me today Hate me tomorrow

Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you

.

Hate me in ways, ways hard to swallow

Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

.

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave

Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made

And like a baby boy I never was a man

Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand

And then I fell down yelling "make it go away!"

Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be

And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"

.

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